Tori Spelling Reflects on Heartbreaking Question from Daughter Leading to Divorce from Dean McDermott

Tori Spelling Reflects on Heartbreaking Question from Daughter Leading to Divorce from Dean McDermott

Tori Spelling’s separation from Dean McDermott may have been on the horizon for some time, but a poignant question from their youngest daughter pushed the actress to take decisive action. The star of ‘Beverly Hills, 90210’ revealed during a recent podcast episode that her decision to end the couple’s 18-year marriage ultimately stemmed from this touching moment.

Impactful Inquiry from Hattie

During an episode of her podcast ‘misSPELLING,’ the 51-year-old actress shared how her 13-year-old daughter, Hattie, literally changed the trajectory of her life. Hattie posed a striking question that made Spelling reconsider the dynamics of her marriage. She asked, ‘Have you ever considered what it would be like to be with someone else and not Dad and get treated right?’ This question evidently struck a chord with Spelling, prompting her to reflect on her relationship with McDermott.

A Toxic Environment for the Children

Although Spelling expressed that Hattie loves her father, the children were not oblivious to the tensions in the household. ‘It got to the point where it was worse for the kids to see us together,’ she recalled. The couple’s struggles were evident, with continual arguments detracting from the children’s well-being.

Spelling noted, ‘We could no longer hide what was happening, the fights.’ The actress admitted the toxic environment had profound implications for their family dynamics. ‘He was an addict going through a lot, and a lot of it was taken out on me. And she saw that,’ Spelling explained. ‘I didn’t like the person I was, trying to raise strong humans and just taking it and taking it.’

Parental Responsibilities and Personal Regrets

In her reflection, Spelling acknowledged that her desire for the children to have both parents together contributed to her prolonged stay in the relationship. ‘On my part, at least, the want of kids, just always wanting their parents together, I think kept me from making what was outwardly a better decision for them than what they saw between two partners,’ she shared. This realization led Spelling to feel she had done a disservice to her children by remaining in a harmful situation.

Family Dynamics Amidst Separation

Spelling and McDermott are parents to five children: Beau, 8, Finn, 12, Hattie, 13, Stella, 16, and Liam, 18. The couple’s divorce filing came as no surprise to those close to them. On March 29, 2024, Spelling took the step to file for divorce, citing a separation date of June 17, 2023. She requested spousal support from McDermott but also sought to terminate any future support obligations he might have toward her.

Custody Arrangements

Beyond financial matters, Spelling sought full custody of their children, while agreeing to joint legal custody arrangements. This highlights her dedication to ensuring stability for their kids amidst the family upheaval.

Public Announcements and Private Battles

McDermott publicly announced the couple’s separation in June 2023 via Instagram, although he later deleted the post. ‘It’s with great sadness and a very very heavy heart that after 18 years together and 5 amazing children, that Tori and I have decided to go our separate ways and start a new journey of our own,’ he stated at the time.

McDermott’s Acknowledgment of His Struggles

In various interviews post-separation, McDermott discussed how his struggles with addiction played a significant role in their marital issues. He admitted, ‘All Tori’s ever done to this day is want me to be happy and healthy, and I inflicted a lot of damage and pain on that woman. I’m taking accountability for that today.’ Highlighting his road to recovery, he noted that he checked himself into a rehab facility to confront his problems.

The Weight of Alcoholism

McDermott detailed how alcohol consumption spiraled into a destructive pattern. ‘Alcohol made me feel good enough until it got to a point where it didn’t,’ he admitted. He revealed that he would isolate himself, drinking excessively while neglecting his family responsibilities. ‘I started feeling good enough until it got to a point where it didn’t – it ended up in isolation,’ he explained.

‘I couldn’t live that life anymore. I was tired of the anger and the yelling.’

The Aftermath of Addiction

During his struggles with addiction, McDermott described moments of rage that left Spelling and their children terrified. These episodes prompted Spelling to worry for his health and safety. ‘When I was in this state, McDermott said he would go into rages that left Spelling and their five children petrified. He would also pass out to the point where Spelling felt the need to make sure he was still alive.

Path to Recovery

In a significant turnaround, McDermott celebrated one year of sobriety in July 2024. This milestone showcases his commitment to change and underscores the personal battles that have occurred behind the scenes.

A New Beginning

As Spelling moves forward, she is focusing on her family’s well-being and her own personal growth. The difficult question from Hattie became a pivotal moment in reclaiming her life and making choices aligned with her values. Both Spelling and McDermott’s journeys illustrate the complex realities behind their public personas, highlighting the importance of addressing personal struggles.